From The Shadows (From The Shadows #1) Read online

  The rest of the day went by in a tat too awkward a fashion. I knew Nathan was trying his best to keep his promise of us taking it slow and therefor keeping his distance, but that was just not how we usually were. We would normally joke around a lot, and have a very physical friendship where Nathan would tickle me until I had no more breath or stopped fighting or he would pick me up, throw me over his shoulder or try to push me off the couch when we were watching movies just to keep me on my toes. But today we were just off and as the evening came around I couldn’t take it any longer.

  My mind was racing to figure out how to get us back to normal. Should I just try to act normal and try to pull him with me or should I try to give us both some real space and leave for the evening? Go out and try to think about something else.

  As I pondered what to do something came to mind; hadn’t Nate said something about him liking me for a while? Wasn’t his exact words “I have wanted to kiss you for a while…”?? Was this why he didn’t know how to give me space now without pulling himself all the way back?

  The more I thought about this the more it made sense to me. He wanted to give us time and let things happen the way they were supposed to, but he didn’t know if he could hold himself back if he began touching me.

  On that thought I decided to give us both some time to breath and to process. We could always talk when I got back later that evening.

  I went to the guest bedroom and called the one girlfriend I had. If ´friend´ was what I could call her… Sasha was my colleague but she had tried to make me join her for several parties ever since we began working together half a year ago. I guess she wanted for us to be friends. I had as always held my distance because I didn’t much enjoy big groups of drunken people and I didn’t trust people either. To put it mildly I wasn’t exactly the social butterfly. Tonight however I needed something to take away my thoughts.

  I had begun getting ready when Nathan tabbed on the door and stuck his head in.

  “Are you going somewhere?” he asked. Confusion clear on his face.

  “Yeah I just need to get out for a bit and clear my head, hope you don’t mind..?”

  He came into the room and didn’t stop before he was standing right behind me. He put his arms around my waist and looked into my eyes through the mirror.

  “Can I join you?… or are you trying to get away from me?”

  I just stared back at him trying to figure out what to say to him. I could see some hurt in his eyes though he tried desperately to hide it. It became so clear to me that he just wanted to be near me and frankly I felt exactly the same about him, but I felt guilt too. I shouldn’t move on this fast, should I? Maybe I shouldn’t even want to, but that part was clearer to me. Of course I wanted to after being in such a poisonous relationship for so long. I needed good things to be in my life. I was just not sure if I even deserved them already, or if ever.

  I had made the choice that I would try to act normal, so I answered “Sure you can join me. But are you sure you can handle being around a bunch of drunken girls?”

  He lifted an eyebrow to say: Are you sure YOU can…….? And then he lowered his lips to my ear and told me in a soft voice that he didn’t care where we were or who else were around, and then he began nibbling at my earlobe with his teeth as he whispered “I just want to be around you Nikki!”

  With his sweet words and even sweeter touch he had ignited a flame at my core. I felt heat spreading through my entire body and my heart began to drum out a samba. All of the sudden my guilt had vanished. I even started to wonder why I should deny myself happiness with the one man who had always wanted the best things for me?

  I leaned my head back on his shoulder, closed my eyes and let myself give in to those sweet emotions now overruling my earlier, less than positive, thoughts. These emotions told me that I deserved a good man.

  Breathing a sign of contentment I whispered to him “I want that too”

  Nathan took hold of my hips and slowly turned me towards him. He looked at me with some uncertainty trying to make sure I wouldn’t back out on him. Then with a crooked smile fighting its way onto his lips he asked “So, no more feeling guilty? No more taking it slow?”

  I smiled back at him and answered “Nope, let’s see what happens!”

  A smile broke his gorgeous face in a big wicked grin and with a sexy glint in his eyes he pulled me closer into his body and crashed my lips with his. I responded by giving his tongue free access to my mouth and letting it dance a sexy dance with my own.

  When we finally broke from each other our breathing was harsh and our pupils were dilated by lust.

  Nathan began giving me open mouthed kisses down my neck and in between each kiss he breathed the words “Are. You. Sure. You. Want. To. Go. Out?”

  At first I was too consumed by the fire he had turned on high within my body to answer him. All I could do was pant. So Nathan took advantage and grabbed my ass, pulling my core even closer to him, and as he did he rolled his hips, pressing his hard-on into me, showing me exactly how hot for me he was.

  I let go of a soft moan and felt him smile into my neck thinking he had made his point. Against my body’s need though, I panted out “I… Promised that… that I would come”

  Chuckling Nate answered. “Baby, I’ll make sure you come.. I’ll make sure you come real good”

  I made a halfhearted attempt to slap his upper arm with my right palm, only making him look up at me with a smirk.

  Even my attempt at looking stern was halfhearted and only gave the outcome of him moving his brows up and down in such a cheeky way that it made me laugh.

  “Okay, okay beautiful, we will go, BUT don’t think I will let you off easy!”

  He kissed me long and slow.

  “Let me off easy?” I raised my brows questionably when he finally let me breathe again.

  “Yea, I’m going to keep you turned on all night till you can’t take it anymore. You’re going to beg me to take you home and ravish you till you are screaming my name”.

  Oh he was such a devilishly sexy beast and I wanted him too much already. I was however not going to give in that easily. This had turned into a game and being the stubborn woman I was; I was not going to let him win.

  I put my hands around his neck pulling his lips down towards mine but instead of giving him the kiss he expected I whispered against his lips. “You will be the one begging”. Letting go of him I pushed against his chest. “Now go and let a woman get ready!”

  He laughed and turned to go to his bedroom to get ready himself. As he went through the door I heard him say “Evil woman” And that just made me laugh even more.

  Then and there I made a choice; I would change from my casual jeans and a tank top into something sexy that would make Nathan drool.

  I duck into my bag to find and put on my gothic lace corset, my red skinny jeans with black laces going all the way up to mid-thigh, black high heeled boots and my bleeding heart necklace with red crystals falling down my cleavage. I got back in front of the mirror to inspect myself and added smoky eye make ‘up and a neutral gloss to my pouty lips.

  I was now ready, and I felt sexy, so I stepped into the living room.

  Nathan stood with his back to me, flipping through the latest number of ´Kerrang! Magazine´. That gave me the perfect opportunity to check him out, before he noticed my presence.

  He wore dark ripped jeans which hung low on his hips but still showing off his perfect butt, a black T-shirt with ghost print of skeletons and down the back on the right side it said Devil Child in white script. The shirt was tight over his broad shoulders and strong upper arms but slightly looser around his lower back, it also showed off his full sleeve tattoo which decorated his right arm. His dark hair was tied back. He was all sexy as hell, and I just couldn’t stop myself from smacking his tight ass as I sneaked up behind him, trying not to click my heels on the polished wooden floors.

  “Hey you sneak, were you allowed to bruise my delicious butt?” He aske
d as he turned around towards me with a fake disgruntled look on his face which soon was replaced with a look of awe.

  “Damn Nikki… You are looking hot”

  I gave him a sexy smile and I knew I had a twinkle in my eyes when I replied. “So I take it you approve?”

  “Yeah, I am not sure I’ll like watching all the men undressing you with their eyes though!”

  I kept smiling at him but I couldn’t stop wondering if he was serious with that comment or simply teasing me. Nathan did enjoy to tease me, but something in his eyes told me his comment wasn’t as light as he was trying to make it by plastering a smile on it.

  Would I like having a possessive guy? Damn straight I would! I wanted to feel true passion and I would like to have my own caveman for a change.

  Mike had never been that for me, and when he had gotten jealous he had just begun drinking and being a mean drunk instead of showing the world that I was his. To be honest drinking was how Mike handled everything that bothered or angered him.

  While I was deep in thought Nathan had gathered me into his arms and was now pulling my chin up, then I noticed I had been chewing at my bottom lip.

  “Don’t you think you should leave biting that lip to me? I bet I would enjoy it much more”

  Getting out of my head I looked up at him.

  “Sorry Nate…” I answered with a small smile

  Nathan kept looking at me for a few seconds longer and he looked like he wanted to ask what was going on inside my head. He then decided against it and instead he said “If you’re ready, then let’s get going”.

  Chapter 4

  The drive to Hard Rock Café happened in almost silence. If it hadn’t been for the radio being turned on I would have gone mad. I kept thinking I had made Nathan mad or said something wrong but I couldn’t, for the life of me, figure out what it could be.

  We arrived to a city very much alive and ready for a party. There were lots and lots of people outside every club either waiting to get in or taking a cigarette break. All of those people made me nervous. Nathan found a parking space and turned the engine off. He then jumped out of the car and went to open my door.

  He took one look at me and asked if I was sure I wanted to go inside.

  “Yea, we are here now, I can do this… We’re just going to go in and hang with some people for a little…”

  “Exactly, and you wanted to go, remember?” He reminded me.

  “Yea I know…” I answered while a frown slit over my face.

  He put his hands on each side of my face as he told me that we could go home any time I wanted, and then he gave me a soft kiss. I jumped out of the car and tailed Nathan into the club, never letting go of his hand.

  As we got in I looked around for Sasha and it didn’t take me long to spot her fire-red hair. She changed hair color so often that it sometimes left me dizzy when trying to keep up, but one thing was for sure, she always got colors you couldn’t NOT see.

  “Is that her?” Nathan asked following my line of sight.

  “Yea that’s Sasha alright, I better go say hi”

  “Okay you do that and I will get us something to drink, are you up for alcohol tonight or are you sticking to virgin?”

  He said that last part with a knowing smile that told me he was thinking about what happened this morning and how NONE virginally I was.

  “Nate stop that” I giggled “And yes I think I will have a bit of alcohol tonight”

  “Okay you go say hello, and I will go get you your poison. I DO know what you like”.

  Nathan turned towards the bar and soon he had disappeared in the crowd, so I tried to find my way through all the exuberant people.

  As I got closer to where I had spotted Sasha I noticed that I knew a few people in the group surrounding her. Those people were folks Sasha and I worked with at the restaurant. There was another female waitress called Maria and the two trainee chefs, Tim and Peter.

  They all had huge warm smiles for me as I reached them, and the fact that I knew more people beside Sasha helped remove some of the nervous energy taking up space in the pit of my stomach. I really was no party person but if I had to be for a night, once in a blue moon, then I preferred none-strangers.

  Sasha leaned in and gave me a hug and as I gave her a kind of awkward hug back I told her. “I hope it’s okay that I brought a… um friend with me?” it felt strange calling Nathan my friend after what had transpired earlier in the day.

  “Sure! The more the merrier. But where is this FRIEND of yours?” She said with a curious look in her eyes.

  “Oh he is at the bar picking up some drinks for us” I answered, now hoping that Nathan would come find me soon. I might’ve known these people but I didn’t KNOW them, if you know what I mean. I began needing my trustworthy pillar.

  As I stood battling with my nerves Tim broke in and offered me a glass of some strange blue shot, which I mostly accepted because I didn’t want to be rude.

  “CHEERS!” The whole group yelled after everyone had picked up a shot and they raised their shot glasses in the air.

  I joined in and threw the shot down my throat without finding out what it was I had been offered before it was too late. It was strong and had me coughing a few times because I had never gotten used to strong liqueur.

  While I coughed I felt a hand sneak its way around my waist and lips at my ear “Are you okay?”

  I turned my neck to look up at Nathan and smiled at him. “Yes I am alright but I don’t think those things are good for me”.

  He then chuckled and said “No.. you always were a week drinker, but don’t worry I’ve got something more up your ally right here” I felt an ice cold glass running over the back of my neck and I shivered.

  Nathan truly did know my tastes, in more ways than one. He had bought me a Frozen Strawberry Margarita, the drink I always looked for when it happened to be a day where I allowed myself alcohol. Smiling I reached out for the drink in his hand, but as I tried grabbing for it he pulled it farther away and sent me a cocky grin.

  “So you think I am just going to hand this over to you without anything in return?”

  Remembering our earlier bet I started giggling and asked “So Mr. Matthews, what is your prize?”

  “I think I would like a taste of those sweet lips of yours” He said as he leaned in.

  I was about to ask if we really should do that in front of all these people. The shy part of me was trying to pop up… But I never got the chance to because Nathan pulled me into his body, my back against his front, and crashed his lips to mine. And just like that, in a matter of seconds, I had forgotten about my protest and responded like there was nobody else around us. I melted completely into him, never wanting to come up for air again.

  When we did break our precious contact, my legs had turned into jelly and I was ready for us to go back to Nathan’s place where I could have him all to myself. No way was I going to admit that though. Nathan was, however, too good at reading me. He began planting soft kisses up my neck and when he reached my ear he asked “Have you regretted that we came out yet?” And there was no mistaking the smile in his voice. He was sure this game was his.

  I took a deep breath to steady myself and then I answered “No way. So you better up your game!”

  His eyes grew big as he looked at me and then a sexy, confident smile took over his face.

  “Oh you cheeky little thing, NOW it’s ON! Soon you will be puddy in my hands and you’ll be begging me to take you home and relieve the ache we’re both beginning to feel”.

  While pondering what he might be planning, it appeared to me that even though I had felt bad about us starting this up, whatever this was, Nathan had taken my nerves and my worries away. It felt right that he held me and the intimate way he was teasing me now felt right too. It felt like we were a couple, but I didn’t want to linger on that thought too long. Though he had taken away the unease, there was still too much that we needed to talk about if this really was the road we wan
ted to head down. Something in the back of my mind had other worries too, worries I needed to take up with him as soon as possible.

  “Nikki” Nathan tried pulling me out of my sudden funk.

  “Nikki, where did you go?” he asked.

  I looked up at him again as he took hold of my hips to turn me around so he could look into my face better.

  “You got that look again, what are you thinking about?”

  I didn’t think I could talk to him about what I was thinking as long as we were here in the club, among other people, but the look of worry that now had drowned out the teasing in his eyes told me that I had to say something.

  “Oh it’s nothing important… “

  He looked at me like I hadn’t convinced him at all. I really couldn’t hide anything from this guy.

  “Nikki, I know you, and I know how you get when you turn into thinking mode, I can see it all over your face”

  “Okay okay, but I don’t want to go into heavy conversation right now…”

  He nodded his head indicating that he understood.

  “I was just wondering about your on-off silent moods yesterday and today, I know I space out from time to time but you usually don’t. Not something I have seen much of before any way.”

  A dark cloud ran over his face then and I knew something was off, and I was right. Nathan admitted that Mike had tried to call him a few times over the last two days and he had wanted to come over, and when Nathan hadn’t answered he had begun asking for me. I could only imagine how accusatory Mike would have gotten if he suspected that Nathan was choosing me over him and it would be even worse if he suspected what was really happening. This was a subject we had to talk about later as well. Nathan had hinted earlier that he was mad at Mike and I wanted to know what had happened. It couldn’t all be because of me because there was no way Mike had already had suspected that there was anything happening between us then. We had been really good friends for a long time and Mike did get jealous more times than one, but I didn’t think there was anything else to be noticed happening between us.